Dear和Peter之间要空一格。
第一句话开头空格到Dear后面。
“ you will come to China” will去掉。
“ in thewinter holiday” 空格。
“in ourcountry”空格。
每一段开头要空两格。
“Beijing has many historic spotsand interest places”变成 There are many history spots and interest places in Beijing.
"the Great Wallis not "空格。
“you can go andvisit the Great Wall”变成 you visit the Great Wall
“When you climb on the Great Wall”变成 When you are climbing the Great Wall
落款全部靠左(靠右也对,靠左方便)
建议:过多的写了长城,后面的景点一笔带过,这个结构需要调整。可在开头说有哪些,然后重点解释某一个,并说明原因。
在写长城的时候,交代一下历史背景会更好。
句式应该多变一点,不要总是 when···, ···
觉得好请给分~~~
you will come to - you are coming to
historic spots and interest places - historic and interesting places
I suggest that you can go and vist - I suggest that you(should) go visit
When you climb on the Great wall - When you are climbing up the Great wall
In the other days - on the following days
other famous place - other famous places
你的语法知识方面已经很不错了,没有太大的问题。。。。。
个人意见,仅供参考
*during this winter
*it's my honor to tell you some awesome attractions available in my country
*If you haven been to Great Wall of China, you are not a true man.
*Something you can add in your essay too.( Did you know that Great of China is the only building you can see from the space with you naked eyes? Isn't it amazing? Based on my aforementioned points, visitng Great Wall of China is really worth your time. Hope to hear from you soon!)
No offence but I think you need to rewrite the whole thing...
第一句如下,建议这么写。I’m very glad to know that you are coming to China this winter holiday.I will tell you everything I know with pleasent .
方法基本没有问题,表述比较清楚。
加油